Around 3-5% of the population is estimated to be Empaths (and approximately 15-20% are Highly Sensitive People (HSPs). 

So, what is an Empath? 

According to Jason Breyer, an Empath can “read and understand other people by resonating with their emotions.” Further, “they are usually hypersensitive, an attribute that enables them to extend beyond themselves into the other soul and capture their inward conditions. This allows them to know exactly what is going on with another person by ‘seeing beyond the superficial and into the true intents of a person.”

Empaths feel everything (clairsentient), and they feel it deeply. They can absorb other people’s energy (both positive and negative) into their bodies. Sometimes, it can be difficult to tell if what you are feeling belongs to you or someone else. 

Judith Orloff shares that Empaths are more prone to take on the emotional or physical pain from others that they haven’t yet worked out in themselves, further describing the trait by saying:

“The empath’s body is different from other people’s. We feel everything. Our bodies are porous, so we absorb the positive and negative energies (and emotions) around us into our muscles, tissues, and organs. This can affect our health in many important ways. On the positive side, we’re able to sense other people’s vitality, happiness, and love within ourselves. However, we can also feel other people’s physical discomfort, stress, and negative emotions, such as frustration, anger, and fear (even when they’re unspoken). As empaths, we can get tired and sick when we’re around toxic people, noise, violence, and rushing.”

Judith Orloff. The Empath’s Survival Guide

Characteristics and Traits of Empaths

There are many types of Empaths. Here are some of the many unique traits and characteristics of an Empath:

• Very sensitive to other’s tone of voice and body movements. 
• can hear what someone doesn’t say in words but communicate nonverbally and through silence.
•  feel things first, then think, which is the opposite of how most people function in our society.
• very sensitive, creative, compassionate, and idealist.
• prone to social anxiety because they’re overwhelmed by the multiple spoken and unspoken signals people give off in groups (Judith Orloff).
• sensitive to rejection.
• have to be soft and delicate to absorb the vibes from other people instead of being tough and repelling all signals.
• can get hurt easily and must be cautious about being taken advantage of.
• can pick up signals that emanate from others and are sensitive enough to break through the barriers and access their thoughts and feelings.
• absorb the emotions of others.
• being in nature is essential for them to balance and heal
• have high intuition; they often just know things.
• They have a gentle, kind nature and BIG hearts, and love and need peace and harmony.
• good listeners
• love to give and help.
• have sensitive senses.
• deeply love and resonate with nature and animals.

Susan Forward writes that people find it easy to be around Empaths because they pick up on your vibration and meet you where you are at.

Some of the Challenges Empaths Face. They:

• often have difficulty with drama; people who talk constantly and are demanding, inauthentic, and toxic.
•  often give their hearts too easily to narcissists and other unavailable people.
• are loving and trusting and often expect others to be that way 
•  are often introverted and have minimal tolerance for socializing and small talk.
• are bothered by noise, crowds, anger, fighting, and tension.
• need A LOT of alone time to process things.
• can easily become exhausted and burnt out from all they are picking up.

Having Empathy vs Lacking Empathy

Having empathy is not the same as being an Empath. Empathy means that our hearts go out to another person and what they are experiencing (happy or sad).

Empathy Deficient Disorder

It is thought that Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths have “empathy deficient disorder,” according to Judith Orloff, which may be caused by an underactive mirror neuron system. In Empaths, the brain’s mirror neuron system (responsible for compassion) is thought to be hyperactive.

Cognitive Empathy

Cognitive empathy is a type of empathy that exists only in the mind. Someone displaying Cognitive Empathy:

1. It can make it seem like genuine empathy, but it is NOT! They can see that another person is upset and can put their mind there, but they don’t feel it! Therefore, they do NOT recognize the needs and feelings of another person.

2. They can’t feel what is going on for another person, so they do not feel responsible or genuinely care.

Egocentric Empathy

Stacy Hoch describes yet another form of empathy called ‘Egocentric Empathy’ where we try to give someone what we would want in the same situation, and this is where Codependents can get stuck.

A Neurological Explanation of The Empath Experience

As mentioned previously, often, Empaths struggle to differentiate between their bodily feelings and those of others. Judith Orloff says There is no membrane separating Empaths from the world (while most people have their ‘defences up’).

She explains the neurological explanation of an Empath’s experience when she says Synesthesia is a neurological condition in which two different senses are paired in the brain. However, ‘mirror-touch synthesis is where people feel the emotions and sensations in their bodies as if the emotions were their own.’

How and Why Does Being an Empath Develop?

We can indeed be born this way. I have also read some interesting theories suggesting its development through childhood neglect, abuse or poor parenting :

“Childhood neglect or abuse can also affect sensitivity levels for adults. A portion of empaths I’ve treated have experienced early trauma, such as emotional or physical abuse, or were raised by alcoholic, depressed, or narcissistic parents. This could potentially wear down the usual healthy defences that a child with nurturing parents develops. As a result of their upbringing, these children typically don’t feel “seen” by their families, and they also feel invisible in the greater world that doesn’t value sensitivity. In all cases, however, empaths haven’t learned to defend against stress in the same way others have.”

Judith Orloff. “The Empath’s Survival Guide.”

Secondly, Stacy Hoch refers to it as a necessity for survival when babies or children in difficult circumstances have to respond to the needs of the parent/’ empath- ing’ (over their own needs). She says, “Someone who does not have to empathize with their parents will be more like oil in energy because they do not have to develop that skill to survive because the parent will meet their needs.

Empaths who struggle to meet their own needs can be very self-destructive and self-sabotaging. We are not supposed to ‘work out other people’s things for them.” For me, this deeply resonates as the root of Codependency.

The Necessity of Having Strong Auric Protection

When Judith Orloff speaks about the “usual healthy defences” being potentially broken down due to difficult situations around them as a child, I believe she is talking about the aura that protects everyone. Diane Kathrine speaks to this when she says:

“Distortions in the aura can appear from an early age, and infant or childhood trauma and illness can result in a weakened aura. A receded aura is caused by experiencing deep hurt and rejection, feeling unloved or unworthy. It can be a knee-jerk reaction to retract the energy field, like retreating into a shell, as a way to prevent themselves from getting hurt again. When the aura shrinks, it becomes destabilized and prone to damage. A strong aura protects against outside negativity, thoughts, energy and even disease. Through a healthy auric field, you radiate inner power and draw in positivity. Your vibrant energy empowers others and helps raise their frequency.”

Diane Katherine. “How to Heal Leaky Aura Syndrome: A Guide for Empaths”

Pranic Healing can greatly assist with healing and strengthening the aura. 

Learning to Thrive as an Empath

To thrive as an empath, it’s important to address our wounds and the parts of us that need healing, love, and care so that it becomes easier to stop absorbing other people’s emotions and energy to stay balanced and grounded. 

Pranic Healing has helped me immensely and is invaluable in regulating my nervous system and deciphering my energy, what belongs to me, and what is someone else’s. 

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT Tapping) can also assist us in regulating our nervous system and healing the wounds we store in our energy system.

 

References: 

Breyer, Jason. Empath – A Highly Sensitive Person – Develop your gift, use emotional intelligence to turn your high sensitivity into a superpower: Overcome negative mindsets and master your social skills. Kindle Edition. 

Hoch, Stacy. The Empoweress- YouTube. 

Forward, Susan. Mothers Who Can’t Love (pp. 146-147). Harper. Kindle Edition.

Orloff, Judith. The Empath’s Survival Guide (Kindle Locations 94-100, 207-284, 155-159, 169-170, 192-101). Sounds True. Kindle Edition.

Kathrine, Diane. How to Heal Leaky Aura Syndrome. 2017